What You’ll Need
- Half Frame Aviator Sunglasses with Black Frame
- White Tuxedo Shirt with Pleats
- HDE Classic Self-Tie Bow Tie in Black
- Clip-on Elastic Blue Polka Dot Suspenders
- Black Satin Cummerbund
- Tuxedo Pleated Pants
- Big Gold Chain Accessory
- Bling Dollar Sign Gold Chain Necklace
- Faux Chronograph Gold Watch
- Fake Hairy Chest
Building the Les Grossman Look From the Shirt Out
The white pleated tuxedo shirt is the foundation of this costume, and it does most of the work on its own. Look for one with a wing or spread collar and sturdy front pleats—the kind of shirt that would normally be worn with studs and cufflinks. You will not be buttoning it properly. Leave the top three or four buttons open and spread the collar wide so the shirt falls open across your chest. The shirt should fit well through the shoulders and torso since the open front means a lot of it is on display.
Black tuxedo trousers with pleats complete the formal half of the outfit. They do not need to be expensive or tailored—any well-fitted black dress trouser with a sharp crease works. The waistband needs to be substantial enough to hold suspender clips, so avoid anything too flimsy or elasticized at the top.
The blue polka dot suspenders are the loudest visual element after the open shirt. Clip-on suspenders are the practical choice here since you will be moving around and possibly dancing. Attach them securely to the front and back of the trouser waistband, and adjust the length so they sit flat against your shoulders without pulling the trousers up too high. The dots should be clearly visible against the white shirt, so go with a pattern that reads clearly from a distance rather than a subtle microdot.
A black satin cummerbund goes over the waistband, with the pleats facing upward. This is one formalwear detail worth getting right—the pleats point up, not down. It should sit at your natural waist and frame the shirt opening from below.
Keep the black bow tie untied. Drape it around your neck with one side hanging longer than the other, letting it rest over the open shirt collar. A self-tie bow tie works best because it hangs naturally; a pre-tied one with a clip will look stiff and wrong.
The jewelry is where you can go as loud as you want. Layer several thick gold chains—a heavy curb-link style chain plus a pendant piece with a dollar sign covers the character well. These sit directly against your chest and are visible through the open shirt, so they need to be substantial enough to catch light and attention. Add a large gold watch with a wide band and keep the sleeve pushed back slightly so it shows.
Half-frame aviator sunglasses with black frames finish the face. The half-frame style is important—full aviators change the look entirely. They should sit low enough on your nose that you can look over them when needed.
The chest hair is a smaller detail that makes the costume land. A realistic fake chest hair piece, the kind sold as a theatrical appliance, tucks into the shirt opening and reads clearly as skin and hair rather than fabric. Secure it with spirit gum or medical adhesive so it stays put when you move. If you have natural chest hair, that works just as well.
For the head, a bald cap with a short fringe of dark hair along the sides and back replicates the character’s receding hairline. This takes some practice to blend properly at the hairline, so test it ahead of time. If a bald cap feels like too much work, a closely shaved head with a bit of dark stubble along the sides achieves a similar silhouette.
Black dress shoes or loafers finish the outfit. They do not need to be formal oxfords—anything black and polished works. You will be standing, walking, and possibly dancing, so wear something you can move in comfortably.
Putting the costume on is straightforward once you have the pieces. The shirt opens wide, the chains and chest hair go on first, then the suspenders, then the cummerbund over everything at the waist. The bow tie hangs last. The entire effect depends on the shirt staying open and the accessories staying visible, so check in a mirror that nothing has shifted before you head out.
